friends

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021240.html

Man in shorts on cell: Well, I think what happened is he lost his pinky because of the forklift. But that's not the point of this conversation, let's talk about me here.

--186th St & Bennet Ave

Overheard by: Rina

Girl: And she's so awkward on crutches, it's so annoying!

--Grand Central

Overheard by: MR T

Guy on cell: So he tried to kill a roach and broke his knee, and that's why he's on crutches for the rest of summer.

--Union Square

Mother to young son: Sweetie, don't trip and bust your head open. I don't have no duct tape to put it back together.

--Laundromat, 48th St & 10th Ave

Overheard by: Jennifer Piston

Blueberry salesman, as woman in crutches hobbles past: You hoppin', but you ain't stoppin'!

--Greenmarket

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021239.html

Man on cell: I need attractive girls with low self-esteem so I can tell them that I understand and then do horrible things to them. This is basic science.

--40th & 8th

Overheard by: 13Atlantic

Irate Wall Street guy standing in deli: Everything! Everything! I said "everything bagel," you fucking waste of life. (to other customers in line) He always does that!

--Beaver & William

Boy, watching Hannah Montana on screen: unless she's hanging from a rope, I can't be bothered.

--AMC 7, East Village

Overheard by: agreed

Female in red coat: It's, like, the Holocaust--get over it! I didn't even care about it when it first happened.

--Bobst Lobby, NYU

Overheard by: wow.

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021238.html

Woman on cell: I can't believe no one said anything... How could no one notice? It used to be sooooo crooked, and I spend all this money to get my nose fixed, and no one says anything?

--Norfolk & Houston

50-year-old lady: So are you still down for the Brazilian wax?

--45th & Broadway

Overheard by: Chuch

Little girl, pointing at someone having their eyebrows threaded: Look! They're sewing that woman's face!

--14th St & 2nd Ave

Overheard by: kenzi

Orange lady: Is it like you definitely, for sure get cancer from a tanning bed? Cause then I might stop.

--Park Slope

Overheard by: Alexis

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021237.html

Mom on cell: So, she's a drunkard and you're taking her to a wine tasting?

--Park Ave

Overheard by: bad idea

Snooty hipster to girlfriend: This event is missing two things. One is wine and the other is cheese.

--Book Signing, Cobble Hill

Man to woman, looking at a wine list: Sure it's good wine. Brandon buys it by the case and takes it fishing.

--W Hotel Restaurant

Overheard by: Bob Leblaw

Crazy MTA employee lady: If you step over the line you will get a fine! And will not be able to dine on all that boxed wine! The fine, it will not be divine! And then you will whine. So don't step over the yellow line!

--4 Train

Overheard by: also stepped over the line

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021236.html

Check in girl: I only like buying books with sparkles on the cover.

--York & 72nd

Overheard by: fance

Teenage girl on cell: I gotta find this book in the religion section. You know, it's like... it's not that you believe in god, or you don't believe in god, but that you just don't care? I want that book!

--Borders Bookstore, Midtown

Amtrak conductor: A free copy of Amtrak's Arrive magazine is located in your seat pocket. For those seeking enlightenment, this magazine is the first step.

--Train, Penn Station

Student, discussing The Sound and the Fury: I suppose it's a very *artsy* ending--a big, retarded guy holding a broken flower... Does that come with skinny jeans and an apartment in Williamsburg?

--Stuyvesant High School

Tipsy 30-something nerd: We can't all be riding escalators with hard-ons.(older woman turns around) What, lady? It's a literary reference, look it up!

--1st & 7th

Overheard by: Phyllis Dean

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021235.html

Guy to boyfriend: I think you're boring. I'm bored.

--W 15th & 8th Ave

Overheard by: Thompson

Woman on cell: I got so bored at work that I started talking to my mosquito bite! I told it to stop making me itch.

--58th St & 9th Ave

11-year-old boy to friends: I'm not ready for death. It's boring. All you do is fly around in the air.

--7 Train

Kid to family, looking at camels: I'm just gonna come right out and say it: 'dis is really fuckin' boring!

--Bronx Zoo

Overheard by: Tyler

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021234.html

Theology professor, after struggling with projection screen: This is Satan doing this to me.

--Lincoln Center, Fordham University

Crazy man with bullhorn: Hanukkah is for God, Christmas is for Satan!

--Fordham Plaza

Conductor: This is an uptown a train making all local stops. Yes, you heard right, all local stops. The e train is out of service today, as it is on a vacation to hell. Stand clear of the closing doors, please!

--A Train

Overheard by: Kirstie

Girl yelling to two friends across train: Jay-Z is like a devil worshipper. No, seriously, he's like a Freemason or whatever. They all are: him, Madonna, Britney...

--J Train

Seven-year-old tourist to mother: Are we going somewhere safe where the devil won't get me?

--34th & 28th

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021233.html

Man, approaching sink: Ugh, there's never any paper towels.
Friend, walking by sinks: I mean, I know my dick's not dirty.

--Penn Station Bathroom

Overheard by: Luke Wallis

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021232.html

Child, playing with friends: Shut up, goddam it! I said shut up!
Mother: Keep your voice down, mommy has a headache.

--6BC Community Garden

Overheard by: Sara

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021231.html

Bookish guy: What is a "well drink," exactly?
Friend: I'm not sure. I've never gotten a straight answer on that.
Bookish guy: I think the bartenders dump all of the liquor they have left over into a well, and they make the drink with that.
Friend: Yeah, that sounds right.

--L Train

Overheard by: WetBandits

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021230.html

Dude, looking at soups: What the hell kind of funny person puts bread in soup?
Female pal: It's Tuscan.
Dude, nodding sagely: Oh, well then.

--Park Ave & 54th

Overheard by: pumpkin

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021229.html

Guy: Why do men keep flirting with me?
Girl #1: Why do you think?
Guy: Is it because of my pants?
Girl #2: Because they're tight?
Guy: These are loose!

--Washington Square Park

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021228.html

Construction worker #1: Yeah, she brought out the body oil and was rubbing it every! I was like "I don't think I'm going to last too long now!"
Construction worker #2: That's one of those dates where you really need to beat off before you go! You really gotta hit the testicles!

--42nd St & 8th Ave

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021227.html

Flight attendant: Sir, are you looking for the bathroom?
Passenger: Yes, which door is it?
Flight attendant: It's the door right there.
(passenger walks towards the exit door of the plane)
Flight attendant: No, sir, not that door. If you open that door, you will kill yourself.

--Flight over JFK

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021226.html

Hobo: Hey man, can I have a cigarette?
Jewish smoker: No, sorry, I'm running low.
Hobo: No, you just don't wanna give me a cig 'cause you're a Jew.
Jewish smoker: Why can't you afford your own cigarettes? Is it cause you're black?

--9th Ave & 18th St

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021225.html

High school girl #1, eating Ben & Jerry's: I am PMSing so bad right now!
High school girl #2, eating Ben & Jerry's: I'm PMSing so bad right now! Actually, I'm not PMSing. I'm on the first period of my life!

--3rd Ave & 10th St

Overheard by: miss blanky-poo

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021224.html

Old lady, observing lavish Christmas display: No, no, no. This is horrible.
Friend: What's so bad about it? Early Christmas stuff is just supposed to make you happy.
Old lady: All it does is make me feel like I'm dying even faster.

--Kohl's Store

Overheard by: ho ho ho

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021223.html

Dude #1: I don't even care, man.
Dude #2: I do! I ain't workin' for no fag!

--Penn Station

Overheard by: Melanie

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021222.html

White girl: Ohmigod, I totally want to take stripping lessons! But, I'm not, like, a slut or anything.
Black girl: Wait, wait. You're not a slut but you want to be a stripper?
White girl: What? I bet it's really good exercise!

--Bard High School, Queens

Overheard by: Sunny

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/021221.html

Boyfriend to girlfriend who just took his hand during encore: One song and then you turn all lovey dovey!
Girlfriend: Fine! Give me back my hand!
Boyfriend: No! I like making you do things you don't want to do!

--Radio City Music Hall